I have been reflecting on my work as a Counsellor and Psychotherapist and about society and humanity. I wish to share with you a simple truth that I always find underneath any problem behaviour in people. The good news is that problem behaviour can be overcome.
You are responsible for your own behaviour, in the present day. No matter what you have been through in life, no matter what historic people, circumstances or events have hurt you, today you are responsible for your own behaviour. That is the simple truth.
You have already survived everything that has ever happened to you, right up to this very moment in which you are reading this article. How you decide to behave today, is a choice that you make. That is your responsibility and yours alone. You may be behaving in a way which is detrimental, damaging or harmful to yourself or to somebody else. No matter what you have been through in life, you could treat yourself more kindly. How you decide to behave is within your power.
Whatever hurt you carry inside, from your life experiences before this very moment, today you can choose how to respond to that pain. The way that you decide to behave. The things you choose to do. The way you treat yourself and others. The way you treat your community, society and even the environment and world around you.
Whatever you do today is for you to decide. It is your responsibility to make the decision about how you are going to behave. People can always blame historic situations, circumstances or people from the past, for problematic behaviour today. There is truth in that, for we will have been affected by adversity. Nonetheless, will you continue to act out on your hurt from the past? How would that serve you?
When are you going to stop treating yourself, others or the world around you badly or unhealthily? When are you going to stop acting out your hurt and take responsibility to deal with how you feel? When are you going to stop using the past as a justification for problem behaviour today?
It’s not easy. If you are struggling, ask for help. If not from a person in your life, then from a charity, agency, medical professional or private therapist. Life can be better. Help is available. You can do this. Make change happen. Let go of suffering. Life truly can be good, even if you cannot see that right now.
This message is not to any specific individual. It is to all individuals; all people.
But it starts with you, the individual reader.
(C) Dean Parsons. 2018.